David SimsEssays

Five Top Tips for Jews on Making Your Hate-Hoax a Big Success

by David Sims

I. REMEMBER that although the planning of the hoax should be meticulous, with all details considered, none of your careful thinking should be visible to the police detectives. What they should see is an apparently simple criminal act.

I.a. If the act is a broken window, then don’t leave any accompanying graffiti.

I.b. If graffiti is used, make the message simple and keep the politics suppressed. “LEAVE!” is better than “GET OUT OF TOWN YOU STINKING KIKE!” or painting a swastika.

II. Provided it can be plausibly done, you shouldn’t be the one to report the “crime.” There is some advantage in letting an uninvolved person notice it and report it to the police; then you should show up and react to it. Plausibly.

II.a. First, display a degree of initial shock. Next, evince a reasonable measure of outrage. Finally, calm down and cooperate with the police as they ask you where you have recently been, who you were with, what you were doing, yadda, yadda….

II.b. As always, keep your answers simple, plausible, and consistent.

III. Be courteous with the police. Police are alert to people trying to bluff them, especially when you display extreme sensitivity towards being offended. So you be Mr. Nice. If they deliberately provoke you, take the high road. Protest politely and point out that they have no reason for being antagonistic. You pay your taxes, and the taxes pay them, etc.

IV. You should represent yourself as being merely a decent fellow who is understandably angry about being targeted by a criminal. Don’t promote your victim status or have a direct influence on anyone else who does so. If you get money as the result of your hoax, then let such “charity” be someone else’s idea and doing. One of the things cops look for, when they suspect a case of “Jewish lightning,” is a payoff. Don’t let them see one.

V. Don’t try to link the “hate crime” with any political activity you might be engaged in. If you’re, say, a traveling Jewish professor who preaches “hate-crime awareness,” then you probably should not be hoaxing up any hate crimes yourself. It smells.

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guest
guest
27 October, 2021 9:57 am

VI. Make sure the security cameras your jewish institution was supposed to purchase by the grant from the Department of Homeland Security are inoperable, looking the other way or not yet installed when you perform your act of “hate”. Even better, spend the grant money on something else. VII. Have the ADL offer a reward for information leading to the apprehension and conviction of those that committed the act of hate. A reward that apparently has never been paid out. Ever. VIII. Wear a “hoodie” or other negro accoutrements when committing your hate act for justice. The police will not investigate too closely if it might lead to a negro. IX. Draw the swastika backwards or distorted to reinforce the image of people who hate jews for no reason are… Read more »

mortal goyal
mortal goyal
Reply to  guest
27 October, 2021 11:22 am

well said…

X. alert your brethren in all corners of the globe so as to make the tiny, pathetic , low-energy hoax an international event…at least until its memory-holed.

Anthony Collins
Anthony Collins
Reply to  mortal goyal
27 October, 2021 12:25 pm

XI. When the goyim know, shut it down.

Arvin N. Prebost
Arvin N. Prebost
Reply to  Anthony Collins
29 October, 2021 11:45 am

XII. If no one is buying your hate-hoax, get the Evangelicals to jump on board by reminding them that “your Lord was a Jew.”

guest
guest
Reply to  Arvin N. Prebost
30 October, 2021 11:10 am

XIII. Be sure to invoke the Holocau$t when you are interviewed by the media. Particularly effective is pointing out that you are a Holocau$t survivor or the relative of one. Lament that needed lessons from the Holocau$t were not learned by some.

guest
guest
Reply to  mortal goyal
27 October, 2021 4:54 pm

Do you know if ModernHeretic has been rehosted?

mortal goyal
mortal goyal
Reply to  guest
28 October, 2021 10:39 am

no sir.

i’m not real computer savvy though…it could be. i really miss it.

looked forward to it every evening.

mortal goyal
mortal goyal
Reply to  guest
3 November, 2021 1:29 pm

sorry to bother….

Any news concerning Modern Heretic?

Brilliant blog, it was.

Anthony Collins
Anthony Collins
27 October, 2021 10:14 am

I have the impression that the perpetrators of hate crime hoaxes typically can’t even spray paint a swastika facing the right direction, so much so that I was almost surprised that this wasn’t the case with the swastika shown at the bottom of the article above. The Jews effectively advertise their contempt for the goyim in the sheer crudity of their hoaxes, such as the spurious hate crimes they perpetrate and publicize. They see the goyische kopf as a bin that they can fill with any rubbish whatsoever. They often make no effort to make their lies even superficially plausible. The psychology of the Jews is even more bizarre and grotesque than their physiognomy, of which Richard Wagner said: “The Jew who, as we all know, claims to have a… Read more »

anthropologist
anthropologist
28 October, 2021 9:28 pm

why are you giving advice to Jews on how to carry out more malpractice. This is insane! Neverg ive your enemy satisfaction, have you lost your mind?

Walt Hampton
Walt Hampton (@walt-hampton)
Reply to  anthropologist
29 October, 2021 3:50 pm

I see no cause for alarm.
I seriously doubt if the
captains of International
Jewry are going to be
swayed by Mr. Collins’
post.

guest
guest
Reply to  anthropologist
30 October, 2021 11:14 am

Worry not. We are just cataloging the reasons jews already give based on decades of observation. In other words, a form of satire. Perhaps trusting goyim will read this and have an Aha! moment and see through the next hoax.

mortal goyal
mortal goyal
Reply to  guest
3 November, 2021 1:30 pm

don’t hold your breath Sir.