Essays

A Very, Very Short Course in Understanding Capitalism

by David Sims

IN YEARS ending in 1, raise the price of a loaf of bread.

In years ending in 2, cheapen the ingredients. For example, increase the sawdust in the dough from 1% to 2%.

In years ending in 3, decrease the length of loaves by 5 millimeters (and slice the bread thinner to keep the number of slices the same as before).

In years ending in 4, decrease the cross-section of the slices by 1 square centimeter.

In years ending in 5, bake the bread in such a way as to increase the size of the holes in the slices.

In years ending in 6, raise the price of a loaf of bread…

And so on.

However, in all the bread commercials on television, always show a loaf of bread as it was made 50 years ago.

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Source: Author

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4 Comments

  1. Shawn Green
    3 March, 2019 at 1:53 pm — Reply

    I thought that it happens only in my country.

    • Anthony Collins
      3 March, 2019 at 10:10 pm — Reply

      As Joseph Goebbels remarked, in a 1920 letter to Anka Stalherm, “capitalism recognizes no national boundaries.”

  2. Arvin N. Prebost
    3 March, 2019 at 3:53 pm — Reply

    There is an angel building a new branch of hell for these people.

  3. Arvin N. Prebost
    3 March, 2019 at 3:58 pm — Reply

    Their bread was low-quality carbs and their “fruit pies” were sugar-and-starch bombs.

    I used to eat “granola bars” until I read the label—carb city.

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